I almost fell outta my seat when I realized that my computer was going to let me post. Usually it says that this website is obscene and tasteless, and it blocks it immediately. Not today! Yippee!
I've missed posting here. I don't have a way, except for the public library to get to an internet hook-up that allows posting. I never get to go by the library.
This past weekend was rough. My best friend's dad passed away. I wasn't sure what to think. He was hilarious. He made me giggle a lot and was so sweet. He could really make you think he was a tough cookie too. I'll miss him a lot.
I could probably say a thousand things more about it, but I don't think I will. Not yet.
Life lately has been strange. I've been waiting. Waiting for Scott to come home, waiting to move, waiting for something in my spiritual life to happen, waiting for my physical image to change, waiting for many things and waiting for nothing. It's craziness. I think too much lately. I can't focus on my exercise, because when I do exercise my mind drifts to everything and frustrates me. It's hard to explain everything.
Scott will be coming home in June sometime. I'm not sure when. I think he knows the exact date, but he wants to surprise me. Sweet.
Have you ever known and felt deeply that your greater purpose was so close but you just couldn't figure out what it was? It's like it is right in front of you, but you just can't see it? You ache inside because you know you are supposed to being doing something.........something......what is it????? I feel like I'm stuck. It's not necessarily a bad thing, just confusing.
Please pray for me.
28.2.06
4.2.06
Long Time Without Posting, Many More in Sight
Sorry it has been a while since I've posted. I've got no sources! My computer at work blocks the blogs, but for some reason I can still read them. I just can't post to any of them. The yesterday it started blocking my yahoo mail account! There's no hope! I'm doomed to utilize the library's resources!
Things are moving along.....slowly. Even though every day gets me a day closer to Scott coming home and us getting married, it still seems as though everything just creeps on by. There are 245 days left until the wedding. I'm not counting, Scott is. haha! I've managaed to get my dress, the church and reception area booked, my passport (sent for), and...that's about it. Yeah, I'm not moving along very well. I hate doing this stuff without Scott. As much as I love him, I don't like emailing all of the details of the wedding to him and sending pictures. I'd much rather have him here with me picking out everything. From what I've heard, though, he'd be doing the same thing he is doing now, just in person. "I don't care, Deresa. Whatever you think is best." He makes me smile.
Stress, stress, and more stress. My fingernails have stopped growing. My face is freaking out. I've never had so many breakouts!! (which I'm sure you guys wanna know this) My legs have started swelling. I look like a fat mamma-jamma with huge ankles! It's kinda freaking me out. Scott says, "Take a week off and don't think about the wedding." How is this possible? I would like to not think about it, but it floods my every thought. I'm worried that when he gets back I won't have everything done that needs to be done. I don't want it to be a flop. I don't want it to be a typical small-town wedding either, because in my head it's always been something more than that. I also don't want to spend thousands of dollars for one day. ACK! It probably would be a lot easier to just elope. Scott doesn't want to. I tried talking him in to it. haha!
Anyway, gotta jet. I'll post again when I get to. You may thank Elizabeth O. for this wonderful opportunity. She's letting me use her computer.
Much love to all!
Things are moving along.....slowly. Even though every day gets me a day closer to Scott coming home and us getting married, it still seems as though everything just creeps on by. There are 245 days left until the wedding. I'm not counting, Scott is. haha! I've managaed to get my dress, the church and reception area booked, my passport (sent for), and...that's about it. Yeah, I'm not moving along very well. I hate doing this stuff without Scott. As much as I love him, I don't like emailing all of the details of the wedding to him and sending pictures. I'd much rather have him here with me picking out everything. From what I've heard, though, he'd be doing the same thing he is doing now, just in person. "I don't care, Deresa. Whatever you think is best." He makes me smile.
Stress, stress, and more stress. My fingernails have stopped growing. My face is freaking out. I've never had so many breakouts!! (which I'm sure you guys wanna know this) My legs have started swelling. I look like a fat mamma-jamma with huge ankles! It's kinda freaking me out. Scott says, "Take a week off and don't think about the wedding." How is this possible? I would like to not think about it, but it floods my every thought. I'm worried that when he gets back I won't have everything done that needs to be done. I don't want it to be a flop. I don't want it to be a typical small-town wedding either, because in my head it's always been something more than that. I also don't want to spend thousands of dollars for one day. ACK! It probably would be a lot easier to just elope. Scott doesn't want to. I tried talking him in to it. haha!
Anyway, gotta jet. I'll post again when I get to. You may thank Elizabeth O. for this wonderful opportunity. She's letting me use her computer.
Much love to all!
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