Sometimes I Just Don't Know

I've been thinking a lot lately about how I view people. It started the other day when I was driving back to my house for lunch. I had to pass by some workers on the side of the road. One guy waved me through the blocked area. He was wearing an orange jump suit. You know, the ones that people usually wear if they are working community hours for the police. I looked at his face as I drove by. I wondered what it would be like to meet him on the street. I started thinking about how I would act toward him if I had just bumped in to him. Would I be afraid? Would I be friendly? Would I even say, "Hi"? These thoughts began the chain reaction in my brain that usually sends me on a wild goose chase.

So many times people are quick to judge others just by what they see. I've made it point in my life to treat everyone the same. Sometimes I'm more successful at accomplishing this goal than others. I've failed many times. I keep trying though. One thing I've noticed about myself is that I honestly believe (and this is the naive part of me that my father says will quickly fade away once reality hits) that everyone has good in them. I believe that first moment of introductions, hellos, glances is the opportunity for them to be completely free of judgments, stereotypes or anything. I start off meeting people thinking that they are truly saints, then I let them decide what they will be to me. I base how I feel about them on how they act, speak, react, express themselves to me. After those first few moments I catch on to what kind of person they will be. Still, I hold out hope that the good will overcome anything and will be what I see from then on. I never think that they could hurt me, lie to me, deceive in any way, or be bad. I guess that is why, most times, when someone does something that is considered unorthodox to other people, I'm a little let down. I put my heart out there for people to play with and not in a romantic way but in a loving way. I've noticed that deep down, when I meet someone, I truly love their souls. They have to decide whether or not to let me.



I don't know........it was clearer in my head. Sometimes it is so hard for me to put in to words what I'm thinking. It can be crystal clear inside and from my brain to my fingers the translation gets lost. I tried.